The Blushing Bride: Pamela Sumit Sarkar

Hello everyone,

I am back with my favourite section of the blog “The Blushing Brides” and with one of my favourite women, Pamela Sumit Sarkar. This is actually a long pending post and Pamela di had already sent the write-up and pictures long back in 2016. I was planning to upload it on her anniversary date that year, but totally forgot to do so. Sorry Pamela di. But better to be late than never, today is 9^th December 2018, her 12^th Wedding Anniversary and here we are sending them all the love and best wishes as they celebrate another year of love and affection for one another.

Happy Anniversary Pamela Di. You are one of the most wonderful women in my life. You have stood my me, you inspire me and I look up to you for every little thing in life. Featuring you on “The Blushing Bride” is such an honour. I hope my readers will find this post as beautiful and helpful as I find it to be …
Lets have a look…

How did you guys met?
“Well I first got a call in the evening from him and got to know that a common friend of mine shared my number with him without letting me know. I was in a bad relationship then and Sumit (my husband) came as a boon for me. After that call, he kept on calling and we used to talk and he pulled me out of the abusive relationship. We met for the first time at Asutosh College. It was October 2005, my Part 1 results came out that day....well Yes inspite of so much tension, I chose that day to meet. It was for a short time. But I guess something clicked unknowingly and even after several fights, disagreements and also unconditional possessive love, here we stand together hand in hand dealing with our life for the last 12 years along with our son.

Introducing Rik Babu :)

After a courtship of 8months, without any prior intimation (as I was willing to try out a ‘live in’ relationship, as I don't believe that love can only be legalized by the institution of Marriage), he called me and proposed and all of a sudden I get to meet his family, who were more willing and eager to bring me home. My father objected being a typical father of a single pampered daughter but of course at the end, gave in and both the families met and the date was fixed.”

So how long did you get to plan your entire wedding?
“The Date was fixed in the month of June, 2006 after getting the desired venue. My social marriage date was 9th December, 2006 which was just a good day and not a typical marriage date (it was not a shubho bibaho logno). We celebrate two days. One is 5th December when we did our registry and the other one is 9th December. We got practically 5 months to make the arrangements and preparations. Well first that came in my mind is that I lost 15kilos before my wedding date. The venues on both sides were booked along with the caterers. Food being an extremely important part of both the families, menus got decided too. After Pujas in the month of October, we selected our cards from numerous shops at College Street. Being Central Kolkatans, we always depended on them for every occassions. The lights, decorations, flowers were contacted but they were done in the last week!!!”

Tell us something about where you got your outfits and accessories, for both wedding and reception?
“Well even though we all dream big things, still we cannot override the works of destiny. My wedding was not a grand affair 12 years back with renowned Makeup Artists and Designers and Photographers. And given a chance I won't change anything that happened 12 years back. It was a simple wedding with loads of sincere love and blessings and that was enough to live an eternity with.

I chose all my sarees, suits, cosmetics, skin care, hair care stuff, shoes, bags and everything both sides. I wanted to wear a red traditional benarasi and bought it from Priyo Gopal Bishoyi after a good hunt. My red benarasi was a lot like my cousin sister's as I wished that only. I had teamed it up with simple red scarf (chunri/dupatta) and gold jewelleries from my mother, grandmom and aunts ---- all were there for generations---- and were from PC Chandra and Senco Gold. Mehendi was done by the mehendi artists from Gariahat.

My Gaye Holud Sari was initially the yellow cotton saree (taant) and then had to wear another yellow cotton saree gifted by mother-in-law during the gaye holud process.

I chose a red Taat Benarasi for the morning Rice Ceremony on the Reception Day. And my Benarasi was my choice too from Adi Dhakeshwari Bastralaya, Gariahat Branch. It was a beautiful light pink (godhuli/twilight pink) one but was very very heavy unlike my wedding benarasi. I was excited to wear it and I wore both the benarasis several times after that as they were very easy to carry anywhere.

I wore the Jorowa jewelleries done with rubies on my reception. It was my mil's gift to me. What irked me was I had to wear a 3kilos heavy flower tiara from 6pm till 2am at night and it was so tiring to smile for most of the unknown people from 1200 ones.”

Where did you get your makeup and hair done?

For my wedding day , my MUA was Sangita Do from a parlour in my locality which was very much popular and was pretty modern in comparison with others. I have irritation with anything on my forehead. So my MUA didn't make the traditional art on my forehead and kept it simple along with the overall makeup. That was the first time i wore red on my lips. She only did my hair. I then had grown my hair long and so no false buns were needed, nor did she used any setting sprays on my hair. She did a big high bun which was not at all heavy to carry. She helped me to wear the sari too along with the jewelleries.

I was new so couldn't say much about my reception look but the outcome actually made me happy. My MIL arranged the MUA from her known salon parlour and honestly I liked her work a lot. She did more or less same job with my hair too. Just puffed the hair in the front part to give volume. The only pain was that heavy weighted flower tiara.

I guess that was when I first saw a new light about Makeup Faqs. Lol!!! That was when I first wore a deep red shade which was completely unlike me 12 years back.

No big photographers were appointed to do the job, mostly due to financial troubles because my father met a fatal accident few years back from then, and lost half an inch of his leg. So there was a financial crunch and I never forced my parents to go overboard with the expenses back then. That we got their blessings and love from my big joint family was more than enough.  The appointed photographers did a good job with capturing the right moments and making the album full of memories to cherish a lifetime. But the video was a bit drag initially with awful songs and scenes so they had to edit it again. And yes just after two days we went to Lachung, Yumsumdong, Gangtok and Darjeeling for our Honeymoon with my newly-wed sister-in-law and brother-in-law. 

Any special moment you want to share with us?
“Oh well there are both special and funny moments that make me giggle and smile whenever I think about them. I am a "ghoti" as in we originate from West Bengal only unlike my husband who is "Bangal" 😉😉😂😂 So we have a ritual of "Aiburo Bhaat", the last grand eating ceremony of a spinster or a bachelor. So it was celebrated just before the grand wedding day. It was a pretty much grand a ceremony where all the near and dear ones, relatives, friends and family showered me with gifts, gold and blessings and the lunch spread was pretty much elaborate too which extended till dinner. So at lunch I was served many courses of bengali food and my mother, aunts and grandmom blessed me with hugs, love and gold and all became very emotional as they all knew that I will be leaving soon and I was the most pampered child at home.

Another special moment was my sindur daan ceremony at 'bashi biye' the next day after wedding. With that red vermilion on my forehead, something actually changed within me. It was such a strong feeling.

Funniest moment for me was when I was about to leave for my in-law house with hubby and practically everyone was crying and I was the one consoling everyone instead of crying. But yes my father was not to be found in the scene and I caught only few glimpses of him when the car left the door. Being a single daughter, I was very much attached to him and it took him a long time to actually accept another man in my life.

Any advice you want to share with all the readers out there?
“Well, just live the moments. Forget the grandeur and cameras, the show-offs are momentary only. What lasts are those little moments with your family. We need to accept that there is a difference between the life before and after marriage for both the brides and grooms and it takes a good solid time to accept and get accustomed in 24x7 schedules after marriage. So enjoy the most before getting married, draw and paint your life in such a way that you would never regret after marriage, in-laws and babies. And enjoy your wedding day. Enjoy the food unlike me, laugh and smile with the rituals and glow with all the love and blessings showered on you that day.
Don't rush to get married. Choose wisely. And then enjoy the whole life with your spouse. And go for your honeymoon as soon as possible.”

“Thanks for featuring my story. I know I wrote a lot as usual but this is a memory of a lifetime and it's hard to miss out points.”

DECKandDINE says:-

I just love your choice of sarees and jewelry. Love your wedding makeup. Glad that the not-so-famous makeup artist didn’t turn you into a disco ball and a completely different person, unlike what many ‘famous’ makeup artists of these days do. Who needs a highlighter when the glow is from within?! Sexiness of happiness you see… J You looked beautiful and impeccable. Your pictures are natural and treat to the eyes. Loved going through your story. May your hearts always remain as caring and passionate as when you fell in love.

Sending all my love and best wishes .. :)